Wednesday, August 27, 2008

This Just In...

Rumor has it that we are going to be getting new seat sacks emblazoned with the school's name and mascot. However, we will NOT be receiving any paper what-so-ever.

(For those of you fabulous readers who are not teachers, it has been brought to my attention that maybe you don't know what a seat sack is....well, if I knew how to add a picture, I would add it. But I don't. In lieu of a picture, a seat sack is a contraption made of canvas that slips over the back of a student's chair like a slipcover. Think Pottery Barn for Teachers in primary colors. On the back of the chair, it has one large pocket big enough for folders, workbooks, notebooks, etc. and may also have smaller pockets good for pencils, markers, etc. They are pure genius. However, after a year of use, they become caked with pencil marks, and collect all sorts of small-child-related-crud. This is the non-genius part. And when they are washed, they smell like a wet dog who has been wet for two solid weeks and is starting to grow mold...and I know, 'cuz I tried.)

Let us break this down, shall we?

1. Seat sacks are the bomb. Seriously, I heart them intensely not only for their increased storage capacity, but because they generally brighten up the room. Getting new seat sacks is pretty rad because it was only a few years ago that we were expected to take our stank, old, used and all-around-nasty seat sacks to the laundromat DOWN THE STREET and at our own expense...(wait for it)... wash them. Take a moment, and let that sink in, because it is truly awe-inspiring bullshit. So, new seat sacks? Score. We'll put a point in the pro column.

2. Last year, the seat sacks that were ordered did not fit the actual chairs in most of our classrooms. We had to sweat, curse and throw all our body weight into wrangling them onto the chairs. It's not a pretty picture, is it? I mean, I guess it's too much to ask that perhaps someone MEASURE our chairs or put some THOUGHT into a rather expensive purchase order. Moral of the story here is My School Enjoys Blowing It's Relatively Tight Load In Irrational And Avoidable Ways Rather Than Think Things Through For A Second. In other words, we now need to add a point to the minus column.

3. Some douche decided that it was a better idea to have the school name and mascot stitched onto each and every child's seat sack rather than have paper. I think this one stands alone as complete idiocy. Essentially, the larger concern here was how each classroom APPEARS rather than what children are actually able to DO in said classroom. This type of concern is mandatory if you are a believer in the Dog and Pony Show, which evidently, we are. Perhaps this year I can teach my students fire dancing and we can really wow the crowds that come through. After all, we don't have any of that flammable paper laying around. Yet another point in the minus column. (Back to the basement I go!!)

4. I am not going to be given any paper this year. In and of itself, this is ridiculous. However, there is more to it than that...oh yes. No paper means I do not get to make my own copies. (Although, when I'm honest about it, making my own copies kind of sucked because I had to do it on the crappy copier reserved for teachers located approximately three miles from my classroom in some dark dingy wing that no one goes to and may not even appear on a map of the school.) An inability to make my own copies equals total dependence on the asshats in the office who are in charge of the almighty photocopier that I am not allowed to touch or know the pass code to. This realization has caused me much pain in anticipation of receiving 13 copies instead of the requested 25. And then having to put in another request for an additional 12 copies. Each. And. Every. Time. I have been down this road before and am not looking forward to my return trip. And...another tally in the old minus column.

5. I just blew $120 at the teacher store. Now, I recognize that places like that are designed to suck vulnerable teachers in, forcing them to buy things they never knew they needed...but I thought I was above that. (sigh) What I should be admitting is, "Hi, my name is Mrs. Mimi and I'm addicted to school supplies, most things "wipe off", and organizational tools." I don't know what column to chalk that one up to.

25 comments:

WackyMummy said...

Ok, I'm a nerd too (in love with post-its) and my ultimate bliss is to organize. No, I'm not a teacher, actually just a stay at home mom, but I love reading about your job and have to say I really respect you for what you do. I loved your blog so much I went and read all your posts from "somebody please just hug me". You rock! (And I hope someday I won't be one of those annoying parents who blindly can't see the forest for the trees... but I probably will.) Have a great week! :D

Emily said...

Well...at least you've overcome the denial that you are, in fact, a school supply addict. "Hi, Mrs. Mimi." I would have to say that I join you in that category. I don't even know how much I have spent at the teacher store and Staples combined this year, but I do know that I have to go back and purchase more at the teacher store today.

(In my defense, we are getting a new school and I am having to be creative as hell to come up with ways to do what I do WITHOUT putting a staple or a nail or a scratch on the walls...but that's realistic, right...I mean what school needs things hanging on the WALLS?!)

But look on the bright side, now all your students will have seat sacks in which to put their non-exsistant paper. Hooray!

Dree said...

I love how the people who make the decisions about the school supplies are not the same people who need to be in the classroom using said supplies. Genius. Pure genius.

That being said, I'm not entirely sure what "seat sacks" are, but I'm sure they're not as useful as paper.

PS - I agree with wackymummy... Post-its are the BOMB. I use them for everything.

AverageMom said...

I don't know what seat sacks are...but they seem like a huge waste of money, especially for a place with no paper!
I feel for you, I do, but reading your blog makes me realize just how lucky I am in my school district. If I could, I'd send you a big box of paper!

nancym said...

Very much enjoyed the seat sack problem. I teach as well and am not shocked at the paper thing. Budget cuts fall in the strangest places. This year the air doeshn't come on till 7 and off at 4:30. We can only access the building sat and sun from 10-12 without any air. This has been great moivation to hurry and finish the work. As for the school supplies- yu will outgrow it. I refuse to buy one more thing we have so much great unused stuff in our builiding it is crazy! Just think how many cute tops you could buy for that money! Being cute is very important.

Anonymous said...

I too heart seat sacks. I bought some last year and they are AWESOME. Of course after washing and drying them they are all wrinkly.

Big budject cuts in my disctrict. The air gets turned off at 4:30. The school is opened every 1st Sat. without air. In order to conserve paper teachers have to ask the front office staff to punch in the copy code to make 1 or 2 emergency copies! There will also be an Energy Police. Some grade level will take their little enery patrols and go to each class to make sure everything electrical is either off or unplugged. We will be left with little notes.

However I was given a box of paper clips, 4 packs of ticky tak, 2 permanent markers & highlighters, and 4 pens in my back to school pack. I should be thankful. (yeah right)But, where are my staples and tape???? Paper? What paper?

jlsatud said...

So sad. We too have the copier rule. I think it has an alarm that goes off if we get near it. Same with the laminating machine.

On the subject of school supplies to become addicted to ... did you know that you can now buy rolls of dry erase paper? It sticks to things like contact paper and makes them into a dry erase board.

Paper problem solved. I'll give them all a square of dry erase paper on their desk, give 'em a marker, and grade their work right away so they can erase it and get started on the next subject.

Cept on dog and pony show days. I think that day we'll just color pretty pictures on our desks!

Not Quite Grown Up... said...

I have tables instead of desks in my classroom, and I love my seat sacks. They are awesome.

The other thing I love though is my paper. It is awesome too. We often put it in our seat sack after using it.

Anonymous said...

Ms. Mimi, I too am an addict. I purchased MY OWN seat sacks for my class this year. PLUS under the seat cloth shelves. $500!! Yep, I did! I also spent another $500 on other fun and interesting supplies. I have been told by my principal to STOP spending my own money and get a grant. I don't want to mess with grants. And, I need the stuff like NOW!!! So, I just go ahead and buy. Also, have you seen all the fabulous colored markers and pencils and paper and ....
Mystery Teacher

Engineer-Poet said...

Why can't administrators who buy seat sacks before paper be sacked for gross incompetence?

Sacking such nitwits would send a message to the public, that someone actually cares about what goes on in the classroom.

hatdog said...

In my district funding for supplies varies wildly. No, it's not supposed to, essentially none of the schools get adequate funding - but some schools have parents who can and will more than make up the difference, while others suffer and do without.

Last year I was at a school where markers were more precious than gold, copies were severely rationed, and while paper and pencils were supplied, they were only passed out once a month. We had to fill out requisition forms to get them, and if you missed the deadline you had to wait another month. All the other teachers had been there more than one year and had their own personal hoards secreted away. I, however, was hired in October into a classroom that had been stripped bare by my "colleagues" well before I arrived.

This year, I was very fortunate to be moved to a school across town. A school where package upon package of beautiful, fresh markers sit unopened in a storeroom to which we all have keys - I could hardly believe my eyes! Markers, free for the taking! Boxes and boxes of paper! There is only one code for the copier, and everyone uses it without limits. I can even take reams of copy paper from the workroom - fearlessly and in broad daylight, no less. Last year, I never even knew where they kept the paper locked up. All because this school is supported by it's more affluent parents, while last year over 75% of our students were eligible for free lunches. Anyone who thinks schools are equally funded is seriously deluded.

The idea that a school is paying for embroidery before basic supplies turns my stomach, by the way. It's almost enough to make me want to go into administration.

The Science Goddess said...

Psst...I identified you as a kickass blogger. Your secret is out. :)

Now, I need a seat sack for a grown up chair because I have NO storage at work. Seriously, they're going to replace my desk with one that has no drawers. What's up with that?

Fidgety said...

Since we're confessing, I am a Sharpie addict. Bring me a Sharpie in a "new" color and I will faint at the sight of it. I just came across your blog and read the most recent post. This is a quote that I posted on my blog yesterday and it seemed so befitting for your lack of paper and your schools choice to personalize the seat sacks...
"Nothing in the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and consciencious stupidity." -Martin Luther King, Jr....I will definitely return to read more. thanks.

J said...

Can I join you in the School Supply Addict meeting? :)
I have been SO thrilled in the last week, because my new school, a charter school, gives out all kinds of beautiful and shiny new supplies to whoever wants it. It is such a thrill! I wish I could help you out with supplies...the seat sacks sound great though.

alotalot said...

I have been thinking about this problem for a few days. I can't imagine how to do it all without paper. Do you get notebooks for their writing or anything? I bought mini-chalkboards a few years ago and I heart them, but I still need paper!

The Uninspired Cook said...

Each teacher in our school was gifted with a case of paper. This is our copy paper for the year. There is no paper kept by the copier (and we're so small that we've got a certified staff of about 12, so no copy person). If you have to make copies, you take your paper to the copy room, make your copies, remove your paper, and pray that you didn't make one single sheet more than you needed. I've taken to copying everything half-page, double-sided, or even quarter sheets if I can get away with it. Sucks doesn't even begin to cover it.

forever39 said...

In your next letter home to parents, include a list of classroom supplies including paper and ask parents to keep thier eyes open if they can find it on sale. You'll be amazed at the amount of supplies you will receive - parents want to help out. One year we had enough money to either put in air conditioning or carpeting, guess which one we got although the old carpeting was less than 10 years old and the rooms got into the high 90's.

=Tamar said...

I'm not a teacher... but why on earth are the seat sacks made of canvas when there are hard-wearing machine washable materials out there, e.g. the Cordura nylon used for luggage?

sexy said...

一夜情聊天室,一夜情,情色聊天室,情色,美女交友,交友,AIO交友愛情館,AIO,成人交友,愛情公寓,做愛影片,做愛,性愛,微風成人區,微風成人,嘟嘟成人網,成人影片,成人,成人貼圖,18成人,成人圖片區,成人圖片,成人影城,成人小說,成人文章,成人網站,成人論壇,情色貼圖,色情貼圖,色情A片,A片,色情小說,情色小說,情色文學,寄情築園小遊戲, 情色A片,色情影片,AV女優,AV,A漫,免費A片,A片下載

情色,A片,AIO,AV,日本AV,色情A片,AV女優,A漫,免費A片,A片下載,情色A片,哈啦聊天室,UT聊天室,聊天室,豆豆聊天室,色情聊天室,尋夢園聊天室,080視訊聊天室,080聊天室,080苗栗人聊天室,免費視訊聊天,上班族聊天室,080中部人聊天室,視訊聊天室,視訊聊天,成人聊天室,一夜情聊天室,辣妹視訊,情色視訊,成人,成人影片,成人光碟,成人影城,自拍

A片,AIO,AV,日本AV,色情A片,AV女優,A漫,AIO交友愛情館,線上A片,免費A片,A片下載,情色A片,微風成人,嘟嘟成人網,成人,成人影片,成人光碟,成人影城,成人交友,愛情公寓,色情聊天室,情色貼圖,色情,色情影片,做愛,情色,哈啦聊天室,聊天室,UT聊天室,豆豆聊天室,尋夢園聊天室,080視訊聊天室,080聊天室,080苗栗人聊天室,自拍,性愛

情趣用品,情趣用品,情趣,情趣,A片,A片,情色,A片,A片,情色,情趣用品,情趣用品,A片,A片,情色,情色

情色視訊,美女視訊,辣妹視訊,視訊聊天室,視訊交友網,免費視訊聊天,視訊交友90739,視訊,免費視訊,情人視訊網,視訊辣妹,影音視訊聊天室,視訊交友,視訊聊天,免費視訊聊天室,成人視訊,UT聊天室,聊天室,豆豆聊天室,色情聊天室,尋夢園聊天室,聊天室尋夢園,080聊天室,080苗栗人聊天室,上班族聊天室,小高聊天室

雪花 said...

福~
「朵
語‧,最一件事,就。好,你西.............................................................................................................
..................

kiloi said...

nike tnEnter the necessary language
translation, up to 200 bytes winter, moves frequently in Chinanike chaussures showing that the deep strategy of the Chinese market. Harvard Business School, tn chaussures according to the relevant survey data show that in recent years the Chinese market three brands, Adidas, Li Ning market share at 21 percent, respectively,

kiloi said...

Puma shoes , Ugg Boots , nike max shoes, NIKE AIR MAX TN ,nike max shoes ,PUMA CHAUSSURES, NIKE SHOX Torch ,puma Ferrari F1 ,PUMA DRIFT CATmens clothing men's sweate, cheap columbia jackets, lacoste sweater, ralph lauren polo shirts,ski clothing. Free Shipping, PayPal Payment. Enjoy your shopping experience on mensclothingstore.Us

kiloi said...

chaussures puma stores offer you the most popular fashion shoes, including the puma basketpuma puma BanXie and shoes. All the puma product factory direct sale, special processing, create the most inexpensive puma stores.National Weather Service Meteorologist Jason puma CAT said this week's temperatures will mirror seasonable averages of highs around 71 and lows about 42 degrees ...

kiloi said...

ralph Lauren polo shirts , Lacoste Polo Shirts, Burberry Polo Shirts.wholesale Lacoste polo shirts and ralph Lauren polo shirts with great price. clothingol.com offers lot of 10 lacoste polo shirts and lot of 20 cheap polo shirts. clothingol.com offers classic fit polo shirts. polo clothing All our shirts made in original factory.

Ginger Snaps said...

First of all, let me just say that the word asshat is probably my all time favorite insult. EVER. And I'm not just sayin' that. I had a boyfriend a couple of years ago who used in and it had wandered out of my memory until just now. So thank you for bringing asshat back into my vocabulary.

Also, I just can't get over some the things that all (other commenters) of your schools do. If I had to put a quarter in a machine for every copy, I'd be penniless. I already am penniless and the sad part about that is that I/WE can't qualify for welfare! (Not that I would want to, just sayin...)

Who's Peeking?