Saturday, March 28, 2009

Back With a Vengence

Alternative Title for this post - I Think I Might Throw My First Punch Soon...

Oh man. I am angry. Angry with a capital P-I-S-S-E-D!

I was having this lovely little Friday with my friends...I introduced a group of super excited readers to a new character, conferenced with some writers who are really making progress and ended the day with a therapeutic session of water colors. It was lovely. Everyone was just tired enough to not stir up any trouble, but just awake enough to still get some work done. Even Big Boy and I had a nice day together. I mean, come on!

I dismissed my friends and went back to my sanctuary, I mean kingdom...I mean CLASSROOM to get some work done. My plan was to bang out some preparations for Monday through Wednesday and hop on the early train. Sah-weet! I was practically drooling at the thought of the Grey's Anatomy, Dancing With the Stars Dance Off and 30 Rock episodes waiting for me on my DVR. Hot Friday night, right?

I pause my productivity to check my school email. And there it is. A cyber middle finger waving at me from the computer screen.

I got an email from the Bacon Hunter. (insert dark, evil music here)

I will try to sum up her bullshit in a nutshell. (Please note that I am writing this post on Saturday, not Friday. Because on Friday, all I was capable of was long, curse filled rants, screaming and a little crying. Why do I let this idiot get to me?)

Like many schools around the country, our students were recently subjected to a battery of standardized tests. Many adults are needed to both administer and score these exams. In our school, that means that all the "extra" staff (read: out of the classroom losers....sorry, but it's true at our school) are used to handle these tasks. Bacon Hunter is one of these losers. As a result, she has not been available for our weekly formal Wastes of Time. And by weekly Wastes of Time, I mean the meeting my team is forced to attend so that we can talk about our instruction (read: poke at her to see if she is still awake, pry the bacon out of her hands and/or explain to her what good teaching is...it really depends on the day.)

Whatever, right? Not really her fault, not really our fault. But my team of Super Colleagues and I have continued to meet in her absence because we are amazing and have relished getting so much done. Seriously, the Bacon Hunter is a real drag on our productivity. When she is at the meetings we must repeat things multiple times so that she can take painful notes that serve no educational or professional purpose. I think she just takes them because notebooks make her feel important. Or perhaps she has confused her responsibilities with those of a stenographer. Or maybe she's just a worthless idiot.

Without her, we have rocked it out. We have planned some seriously rad stuff and our kids are totally pumped. Some of the things we were working on have re-energized my teaching and the way my students and I look at math. It's pretty hot.

So keep in mind that all this is going on while she is giving and grading exams. She never emails or speaks to us about her absences, nor does she ask if we need any of her "support."

AND THEN....we get an email from her informing us that she went to the Weave since we have been refusing to meet with her. She is all of a sudden concerned about the infrequency of our formal meetings and BLAMES US. THEN....oh THEN....this freaking moron actually accuses us of NEVER MEETING and IGNORING OUR PROFESSIONAL RESPONSIBILITIES!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! (Sorry. I guess I haven't gotten over the screaming....)

So because SHE is a lazy piece of dog poo, she assumes that WE are lazy pieces of dog poo. AND calls into question my/my team's work ethic and professional commitment to our administrator! As icing on the cake, she is demanding that we submit all of our lesson plans from the last month to HER so that we can prove to her that we were working in her absence!

Hold on. I have gotten myself all worked up. I think I need to put my head between my knees for a moment. (If it wasn't 9:30 in the morning, I would definitely substitute deep breathing for a cocktail.)

I read the email and stormed down the hallway where I found two of my other Super Colleagues in similar shock. I was pissed. Another Super Colleague was crying.

Happy Friday everybody! Try to be productive now!

12 comments:

Karen said...

I have a person like that at my school. Mostly she's really good at delegating HER responsibilities out to classroom teachers who, of course have all the time int eh world to do extra work!

Ricochet said...

Take a deep breath and remind yourself that this is how the suits justify their existence.

Mr Hulk, AKA my principal, informed me this week as he was chewing my ass off, that I have no relationship with my students and I need to work on that.

Good news for me, this week two students from last year came to see me and tell me they want to be in my class, and another student told me he would love me all the way to the end of the semester (OK, I'd just help him raise his grade, but still!). Another student spilled his heart - and his tears - to me as he worries about getting in trouble.

Now, repeat after me: Illegitimi non carborundum. (or to be correct: Noli nothis permittere te terere.)

Emily said...

Lovely...I can't (well I can) believe that she didn't even think of speaking to your team first before going to The Weave about this! I mean, it's true that she had to do the standardized testing nonsense so she couldn't meet with you. But wouldn't it be considered part of her job to, um, I don't know, ask you how the meetings are going without her? And it's not like she even communicated with you AT ALL. I feel your pissed-ness. Grrr....

I honestly don't know how these types of people remain employed...

ChiTown Girl said...

What an assbag!! I'll be curious to see what The Weave's reaction is to this whole thing. Please don't forget to update us :)

Rebecca Bell, Ph.D. said...

Breathe like a rainbow...breathe like a rainbow...

What kills me is this person probably makes twice as much as teachers and she actually undercuts productivity. UG.

Heidi said...

How Interesting. I was similarly P-I-S-S-E-D at 9:30a this morning. My suite mate is fantastic at trying to delegate her work to me. Apparently, I am her assistant. After a very polite email response to her (while gritting my teeth of course), I am going to get a pedicure. Maybe you should join me. :)

Reni said...

Ok, now I definitely know that we are kindred spirits. If it wasn't that you work in the north, and I in the south, I would be firmly believe that we worked at the same school. How in the world do these people get into education? Not only that, but in "leadership" positions? And people wonder why our education system is in the shape that it is!!!

LaughterHappens said...

Some people are just plain dumb.

Keep that thought in mind, put your happy teacher smile on and whip out those awesome lesson plans. It'll prolly blow her so far away, she'll think she's gone to heaven. Except for the lack of bacon. Then, because you are so awesome, she'll take credit for all of the awesomeness. Because she's dumb.

You know you're awesome.
We know you're awesome.
And probably somewhere in the bacon filled pit of despair, she knows you're awesome.

And... it's 5 o'clock somewhere, right?

Rachel said...

Ugh, how terribly, terribly frustrating. Don't worry, I think your reaction is completely understandable! Insult someone on such personal and professional levels without any evidence is low. Lowest of the low. Do tell us how your admin handles this.

I know that my admin would gently but firmly tell us that we should email her notes of our meetings, but they would NOT let her think she was in a position of authority above us. I hope your admin can set her right, too. Hope you can take some deep breaths and put her away so you can enjoy what's left of your weekend!

Michelle said...

She *actually* thinks you haven't been working for the past month. Wow. I don't even know what to say.

Tara, Paul, Rebecca, and the dogs... said...

It seems to me that the moment a person hops into an "administrative" position, they lose all ability to effectively communicate. How else can you explain the MANY times I've gone through similar situations with my higher-ups?

Me (home sick with a kidney infection), answering phone at an unreal 7:45 A.M. (when I should have been resting and recuperating):
Hello?

School Secretary: Um, yes, Principal So-and-So wants to know where your report cards are.

Me: Here, with me. I'll turn them in when I get back. I have a kidney infection, hence the calling in sick.

SS: Um, they're due today.

Me: I thought they were due Friday.

SS: Um, no- they were due today. Didn't you hear?

Me: Look, I know I'm shooting the messenger here, but tell Mrs. So-and-So that since I received no official e-mail about this, they'll come in when I come back.

SS: Couldn't you have a friend or family member drop them off?

Me (barely able to contain myself): With all due respect, do not call me again. I will be resting and the report cards will be in WHEN I GET BACK. [click]

(I only WISH I made that up...)

KdgQueen said...

How obnxious! I have very similar co-workers. Teacher across the hall and the Higher-Up have been talking to everyone in the building about things that are going with my student's home lives, then tell me that we are calling a meeting because the gossip needs to stop.

To top it off, Teacher across the hall comes in for 5 minutes, then tattles to Higher Up, who decides to yell at me. Then Teacher across the hall says, "I don't feel welcome in your room." Gee, wonder why?!

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